


Jezebel

by onmyheart



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Angst, Cheating, Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-07-07
Updated: 2013-05-22
Packaged: 2017-11-09 08:07:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/453239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/onmyheart/pseuds/onmyheart
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Tony gives the excuse that old habits die hard and proceeds to cheat on Steve. Steve thought he knew exactly how to solve the problem.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Jezebel

The remains of what used to be a glass of orange juice laid shattered. The scent now putrid. The tray it was brought in was overturned on top of what would've been breakfast in bed. The room was not unlike the forgotten breakfast. To the inexperienced simpleton, the room could have been easily mistaken for an unfortunate location for one of Bruce's Hulk-outs. But to the trained eye, the distinction between a Hulk-out and the wreck at present lies in the gravity of the mess. Here the wreckage seemed more carefully calculated and meticulous in the way that it was ruined. The bed being one of the few exceptions.

Hours before, Tony had awoken to the touch of a rough hand. One he recognized to be textured with callouses. Callouses made out weightlifting and not of shield slinging. 

It wasn’t completely ridiculous to be able to tell the difference. Tony was an experienced lover. He still believed to be in his prime despite arguments from the press and from his very own teammates. 

_Old habits die hard._

The words resounded and he woke with a start. The last remnants of sleep left his eyes. Leaning on his elbows he laid eyes upon the limp naked body of a man he couldn't remember. Horrorstruck, he finished pulling himself up so that his back now leaned against the headboard. The hand that had laid on his face slid down to his sheet covered waist. He also noticed then that he was more awake than he had previously thought.

_Ha! Still in my prime._

Instantaneously, as if the thought had triggered it, a headache overpowered his skull. Never had he ever gotten one so severe. He shut eyes tightly and pinched the bridge of his nose in the hope that that would remedy it. 

After years of drinking, he never mastered the technique of overcoming a hangover. In recent times he hadn't the need for it due to lack of said hangovers. Perhaps it had something to due with a tall handsome blond who currently should have been the one presiding next to him. 

It was in that instant it all came to him. He was Anthony _Tony_ Stark and he was on top of the world because he was dating- 

The knob to the door of his bedroom began to turn and his sudden realizations could not have saved him from what would occur next. 

Steve walked in with a smile matching the pristine white T-shirt he was wearing. Blue slim fit jeans and the pair of brown suede boots Tony had bought him. It was Tony's favorite outfit. 

The smile left as quickly as it came.

"Steve, I ca-" 

The sentence was left unfinished and the tray Steve was carrying promptly hit the floor. The glass containing the juice he had only just squeezed splattered on the carpet.

"Ste-"

Steve turned and slammed the door behind him. The pace to Tony's heart hastened and he reacted. He'd get dressed and find Steve and try his hand at explaining something he himself couldn't. His underwear laid under the man's pillowed head. He pulled the charcoal slacks over his boxer briefs and thanked himself for not going commando the night before. He pulled the royal blue button down on and made for the door and looked back at mistake he made. No amount of art supplies was going to fix this one. 

He was out of breath when he found Steve in the living room. He was sitting with his back straight with his hands on his knees, nearly hanging off the edge of the couch. He stared forward and gave no acknowledgment to Tony's presence. The ache in Tony's chest made itself known. He carefully approached Steve in carefully calculated steps. He had reached Steve and had gone on his knees between Steve's. He then placed his hands over Steve's. Tony was no beggar but he was not so far gone to not have that change.

"Steve I-"  
"Get. Your. Filthy. Hands. Off. Me." 

Tony crumbled. Steve still hadn't made eye contact. He obeyed and proceeded to hang his head in shame. Shame he never realized he could feel. Steve had shown him that he was capable of a wide array of emotions. Some of which he was more accustomed to.

"I loved you." 

_Loved. Past tense?_ Tony thought. He still hadn't managed to look up again. 

"I loved you," he started again. "And you go and f-" He sighed and he shook his head. Even at the worst of times he managed to keep his temper in check. This was perhaps a turning point. "You go fucking around like if I were nothing. I'm not..." He looked down to see Tony staring into his hands. Steve flinched at the thought of Tony's hands roaming on another man's body like they had on himself. 

"I can't believe you." This he said attempting to stifle the tremble that came with it. He got up to leave but a tug on his right leg said opposite. 

"Steve I-"

"Have you nothing else to say besides my name? Is that _it_? Is that all I am to you? A damn _name_!?"

"Please just li-"

Steve kicked him off. 

"I'm leaving," he said as he walked off into the direction of their room. Tony scampered onto his feet and went to impede Steve from making any more brash decisions. He walked right into his back in the doorway to the bed room. 

"Get out," a voice he couldn't believe was Steve's said. It was as stern and cold as he ever heard it. The ache in his chest worsened.

The tall, lean brunette Tony made the mistake of sleeping with caught Steve's glare.

With his head still hung, he took in the sight of Steve's clenched fists. Tony had always admired the way his hands always retained a red tinge to them. Particularly around his knuckles that faded along the length of his fingers. It was one the many things he loved about him and he trembled at the idea of never having them touch him that way again.

"So help me God if your not ou-" 

"Alright, alright. Shit. Stark, you didn't tell me you had a fucking prissy ass blond riding your pretty ass like this," the sculpted, sandy haired man said cocking his head so as to see around Steve while pulling his shirt on.

Steve crossed the last few feet between him and the side of the bed that he claimed to be his where the brunette had slept. 

"You wanna shut up," he said through his teeth. "You'll have my hands around your neck paying for your sin otherwise."

He smirked as he reached down for his black leather jacket. He made his way to the doorway where Tony stood studying the overturned tray without breaking eye contact with Steve. 

"Call me when you get your dog on a leash babe." He gave Tony a firm slap on his faintly sore ass and made his way down the hallway leading to the stairs disregarding whether or not Steve would react which added to the already many errors he had made. The first being having slept with a man that clearly belonged to Steve. 

Not many seconds after, he was on the floor with a quickly developing black eye and possible cracked ribs.

Steve on one knee asked, "Care to repeat?" Nothing but a painful moan escaped the man's lips. "I trust you can find the door." 

As Steve stood and turned, the man found the wall and used it as leverage to stand once more. He didn't let go until he found the railing to the stairs leading to the foyer. 

"You."

His eyes now on Tony. The stern cold man who had just punched another with the swagger of a raging bull was now near tears. 

Tony was on on knees for the second time that day. His arms limp and his mouth speechless. 

Steve crossed the threshold to their bedroom once more, stepping over the breakfast he had made. The room was previously only Tony's but after sharing the bed countless times, it was finally decided they would share it indefinitely. Tony never liked it when he left his side every morning. 

He was pulled from his reveries at the sound of glass cracking. With eyes half lidded, partly from holding back tears, his gaze found Steve looking at the cracked mirror as if it would tell him how to make things right. 

"How could you be so foolish?"

The mirror was on the floor now. Glittering chunks scattered everywhere. 

"How could you be so sex-crazed?" 

The trinkets that occupied the cherry colored record player in front of where the mirror used to be found themselves next to the remains of said mirror. A few of the trinkets Steve himself had made. Among them were figurines he had grown to care for after finding them in the rubble of the aftermath of many of their battles. It was an attachment he couldn't explain other than the pure coincidence of them being mostly Iron Man and Captain America figures.

"How could you be so stupid?"

The record player was now in two. These things were poor substitutes for what would otherwise have been a punching bag. 

" **TELL ME!** " 

Silence. 

"So damn foolish." A huff. "You are so _damn_ foolish. What the hell did I ever see in you..." 

That hurt more than anything. Up until then it had always been Steve. Tony always knew. Even from a young age he never fully comprehended how he could be so giving to a man he'd only seen through film strips and propaganda posters. It was his firm believe that if the day ever dawned he'd meet Captain America, he'd do the utmost to know the man under the cowl and learn everything there was to know about his body and heart. 

Tony felt a light breeze caress his cheek and instinctually reached for the calf that had just past him. He hadn't even noticed when Steve attempted to make his exit.

Through the lump in his throat,"Please don't leave me." It stung saying. He wasn't sure if was because of the emotion stuck in his esophagus or it was his pride that was wounded. 

"Stand and say that. Look me in the eye."

Tony did so with barely enough strength let alone the courage to look at the piercing blue eyes that nearly always looked at him with endearment and occasionally with lust. 

"Please don't leave me."

If there was ever a doubt they weren't there, the tears came pouring down now. 

With his emotions slowing his reaction time, he felt Steve's firm grip on his elbow dragging him back into their room, the door closing the door behind them in the process. All he could think of was the beat of his heart hastening and something like heat prickling every inch of his body. 

He was already hot when the scorching heat of the shower head hit him. He was now standing semi clothed under the water. His shirt had not been buttoned so Steve must have gotten it off of him with relative ease. Steve, still fully clothed, was on his knees tearing at the fabric below Tony's waste.  
Tony had made a point in investing in boxer briefs made of comfortable nylon which held him much better than the plain cotton ones Steve was used to wearing. The water now plastering his already tight underwear closer to parts of his anatomy he knew shouldn't be aroused. 

"Now is not the time," Steve looked up to Tony with his thick lashes sticking together with the downpour of water. He wasn't amused. 

Amusement was the last thing on Tony's mind but he had other things think for him and the rumpled sheets on their shared bed was proof of that. 

Steve was now the one with a lump in his throat. "I can still smell him on you. Damn you! Damn what you did!" He was on his feet now. "Tell me." Traces of hurt and betrayal left him. His forearms flat on the tile behind Tony's head with it in between. "Did you like it?" Steve's fist hit the tile, cracking it. "Did you think he was me? Is that how you're going to justify it?" 

Sputtering and not able to form words out of _I'm sorry_ and _to forgive is to believe_ , Tony's eyes met Steve's again and saw the difficulty of sorting between the streams of water and the actual tears if had bothered to shed any. 

Steve extended his left arm reaching for the soap and sponge. He rubbed the two together and began washing whatever remained of other man's scent. He scrubbed harder the further he traveled down Tony's body leaving the skin pinker than he had ever seen it. He'd make sure not to smell another man that wasn't himself on Tony. The thought only intensifying the ferocity with which he washed the other's body. 

"What'd he do to you?"

The hand with the sponge now hovering above Tony's still too tender opening. All that escaped Tony now were whimpers and sudden gasps. Steve's other arm wrapped around Tony's waist. 

"I want to hear all about it." 

His hand reached lower, dipping into Tony's boxer briefs and teasing the skin between his cheeks.

"Ste-"

He was scrubbing harder earning a plea from Tony. 

"Please stop, please." 

"Did you tell him that? Is that what you said?" 

Tony didn't think he could scrub harder but Steve did and all he could do was rest his forehead on his shoulder and try not to give him the satisfaction of him being so submissive. There was no real point in struggling. His body had gone limp and when Steve finally let go and stepped back, he slumped against the cracked tile of the shower wall realizing that he had came in his underwear. All he could hear now was beat of his heart he swore was in his ears. 

He was on his feet again. Not by his own design but by Steve's too tight grasp. He'd feel the bruises later. He was still in the haziness of an orgasm he doesn't recall having. He was on the bed now. With legs spread and Steve between them, he felt the wetness of his underwear leave him. 

Two fingers entered him and he felt them curl in a way Steve only knew how. The area was still too sensitive and Tony squirmed, fisting his hands into the sheets.

A new wetness was on him. Steve was still fully clothed, wet, and grinding into Tony's still throbbing cock. 

"Did he love you the way I do?" 

Steve was asking too many questions and with the fingers inside of him, Tony didn't have the coherency to answer. The fingers slipped out and he felt the familiar weight leave the edge if the bed. It wasn't long before the weight returned and the fingers were replaced with an also familiar warmth. 

"Can we t-," Tony tried to say between gasps. He failed with the head of Steve's cock brushing against his prostate. He had driven in completely engulfing Tony with the length of his arousal. Steve rolled his hips back only leaving the tip. Instinctively, Tony clenched and felt Steve's cock hit the one spot he only knew of. 

He carried a brutal rhythm and resolved to leave Tony as used as he felt. He slowed his thrusts allowing Tony to speak.

"I'm so sorry." Steve's arms were on either side side of Tony's head. A trembling hand climbed up to Steve's bicep, tracing the vein that faded out into his forearm. Steve thrust into Tony once more. 

"Please still love me."

Red eyes gazed up and clear blue ones. Both searching into each other, eagerly seeking the answer to a problem knew wouldn't be easy to solve. 

"I don't know what I was thinking. Steve I-"

Another thrust forward.

"You've done enough talking." 

Steve's hands now at Tony's hips gripping them causing him to tense, clenching harder around Steve. Both hearts racing in anticipation. Steve bucked his hips once more and felt his arms go limp; his now weak arms trying not to crush the body beneath him. He looked down and saw that for the second time that day, Tony had reached climax without a single stroke. 

Steve pulled out and sat back on his heels to observe. He didn't know what he'd expected to see but half of his lover's face was buried in the pillow behind him.

With a lip quiver,"Happy anniversary Tony."


	2. The Way That I Love You

The truth was that it stung. He had always been cautious with his heart but the catch being that at the same time he had been so giving. He had known better. He'd met his father and he eventually found that the apple didn't fall too far from the tree. But he liked the lie of it all. The very familiar wall built to keep everything and everyone out. It took much work and effort and endless words of love to break it all down. Yet, the tables turned and he was the one crumbling. 

Steve sat at the foot of the bed, his thoughts the best company since he turned the knob to their bedroom. He still wore his birthday suit afraid that if he clothed himself he'd have admitted this was as real as his jump in time. His legs were pulled close with his arms wrapped around them. His face buried in his knees. 

"After all of this time that we tried," Steve murmured, the sound of his own voice scaring him, echoing in the too silent room.

Tony cocked his head up. He was looking at his hands again. They were still trembling with all that had happened. 

"Come again?" Remnants of the quivering left him. Tony'd been exposed. Steve had seen him at his most vulnerable and now he'd work on proving that he was everything but.

"Not the time for your antics." 

"I'm sorry, show me the papers that said I'd be yours and only yours." 

Steve turned and snarled. He withdrew almost immediately realizing what Tony was playing at. 

"Cut the crap Anthony. There's no one here but me. This little show," he gestured to Tony, his face one of disgust,"isn't fooling anyone."

And with that, his last reserves of being the man with an iron front had left. The man who sat entwined in the bedsheets was now only a shadow of the former Tony Stark. His lips resumed their quivering with the thought of being known so well. So damn well. His face spasmed as he tried to hold back his tears.

"You don't know anything," he croaked.

Steve got up and walked to the ruined record player. It had spilled papers and envelopes onto the carpet. He crouched down and picked a few of the smaller, thinner pieces of paper and stood before the bed. 

"I'm sure you thought that." Steve threw the papers hitting Tony on the nose. His face had turned trying to avoid the hit but once his eyes landed on what was thrown, his heart stopped. What he was looking at were receipts after receipts of what he spent on lavish clothes, shoes, and restaurants all neatly collected within a rubber band. They were things he used to lure them in. He didn't want to find out what else laid wrecked on the floor.

"I told myself that I was being ridiculous but things just didn't add up. Tell me, just how much should I know?"

"I-"

"And today, of all days, I find out we were living a lie. After all of this," he extended his arms encompassing the whole room and laughed without amusement,"this love that we made." Steve hung his head laying his eyes on the carpet, focusing on nothing in particular. It took him a moment to find his voice again. "Now I know you don't love me the same." 

"I do. I really do." Tony's own ears betrayed him as Steve easily rendered the words he had just uttered as a whisper. On all fours, Tony crawled to Steve who was now gathering his things in a bag. Had he planned this? 

"Heck of a way of showing it," Steve said shoving clothes into the duffle. Oxfords, flannel, plain white shirts made their way into it, quickly filling. 

"Lis-just listen," Tony said trying to keep Steve's arm from putting anymore things inside the bag by placing a delicate hand around his bicep. As if the very touch burned him, Steve quickly retracted his arm. Scorned.

"No Tony. I'm done listening." Their eyes met and Tony knew there was a special place reserved in hell for people who made Steve Rogers cry. "I just," a sob,"I knew I felt like you were hiding something." Steve 's throat threatened to give out as he choked on the words he spoke. "I didn't push it. I thought I'd give you time. I would pretend I didn't see it. All the whispered phone calls, the messages... But tell me," Steve wiped the tears off his face with the back of his hand,"why'd you have to lie to me?" 

The deafening silence returned and Tony felt the weight of the world on his shoulders. The words weren't there. And if they were, he knew he wouldn't be able to vocalize them. All that came were tears streaming down his cheeks that glistened and trickled down to the sheets.

Temporarily blinded, upon hearing the door slam and the draft settle, he ran to the door ignoring the pain that came with stepping on the glass shards and wood chips.

Still bare, he felt the coldness creep fast into his heart and through his body. Steve was leaving. God knew what he would do if he heard the front door slam. He was getting away and he couldn't find the words to speak or actions to take. 

Miraculously, his feet found the top of the stairs. He began his descent leaving small smudges of blood as tracks. He felt small pricks drive deeper into his feet with every step taken. He had made it to the end of the stairs when his vision began to blur again. He irritatedly rubbed trying to alleviate the bother.

"Steve." It sounded more like a whine, a plead, than a call. "Steve please." He was huffing out breaths now. He felt his face burn with fresh tears tasting the bitterness at the corners of his lips. His sight would not cooperate. His wrists served as poor substitutes for tissue.

He could hear movement. It came from the laundry room. Taking every ounce of strength he could gather, he felt his way to the room. Instinct played his guide. 

Steve was wearing sweats now. Clean clothes out of the hamper was strewn all over the floor. He was shoving more whites into the overflowing bag. 

When his knees met the cement floor, Tony could not remember. He was looking up to meet puffy blue eyes. He was crying uncontrollably now. Steve had him on his knees bawling. How he could salvage any of his remaining dignity was a mystery.

"Please don't go."

"You already made that decision for me."

"Steve, I'm asking you give me-"

"No," he was crouching in front of Tony now,"don't you dare ask me for anything because I've given it to you. Everything. Everything I hoped for, everything you needed, everything you asked me for, I gave it. Don't you dare ask me for something more because I gave it. All I could. And now," he was standing again,"I'm done."

Tony fisted his hands in the fabric of Steve's sweat pants and hunched forward. "I'm sorry." It was a miracle he had a voice. "I'm so sorry."

"I pity you." Steve kicked him aside and Tony felt both of his sides burst with pain. One met the doorframe and the other the force of Steve's barefoot. His head colliding with the doorframe was an additional, unintentional pain. He felt his eyes flicker and the last thing he remembered hearing was the slam of the front door to their mansion on Fifth Avenue. 

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"Hey it's me. It's Steve. I'm running a little late. Fury needed a bit more of my time than I anticipated. Won't be home till later. Maybe not till tomorrow. S'gonna be a while. Don't wait up. Happy anniversary Tony. I love you."

A beep. The crisp British voice, "Yesterday, twelve thirty pm."

"Replay."

"Hey it's me. It's Steve. I'm running a little late. Fury needed a bit more of my time than I anticipated. Won't be home till later. Maybe not till tomorrow. S'gonna be a while. Don't wait up. Happy anniversary Tony. I love you."

"Shall I replay it again, sir?"

When no answer came the silence resumed and he flirted with the fatigue that weighed his eyelids down. Time hadn't been a factor since he awoke and Steve left.

Steve left.

The words resounded and he swore the walls of the laundry room echoed them. He hadn't bothered to get up. Not that the fresh bruises on his obliques permitted it. And yet, the voice of the man who gave them to him was the first thing he wanted to hear. The headache clouded most of the words but he found comfort in the few he could make out. 

His head leaned on the doorframe. He may have been concussed but he was too tired to drawn a perfect conclusion. 

•••

The second time he awoke, he mustered the strength to stand, wincing all the while. He shivered with the emptiness that Steve left upon his absence. His bare feet sounded much louder than when the others were present. 

It was a vicious cycle he lived. A pattern of loneliness, drunken stupors, and waking to more than just heartache. Steve had changed that. Something in him made Tony want to be better. He was a little less lonely, a little more sober if not completely, and the fulfillment that came with waking up to a warm body was more than enough to purge Tony of his demons. 

The one that never left him had festered. It consumed his every thought until it left him on the cuffs of something that would shatter hearts. He was no religious man but through his lapsed belief, his moral compass was built strong. But it had faltered. Although his heart, body, and mind belonged to another, committed, his body asked for more.

It quickly grew into a metaphorical cancer. One that could not be treated but instead satisfied. A satisfaction that only came from the afterglow of sex. More than cancer, it was a drug he was hooked on from the moment he had first had it. 

The need was very satisfied after meeting Steve and learning his body and its language. It was true. Whatever Tony craved, whatever Tony wanted, Steve was there to fulfill it. The love that grew between them was a bonus. 

Somehow the need, the cancer, grew tiresome. It sought out more than just a single body.   
Tony wasn't a weak man but he simply couldn't deny himself of the pleasure. His fault was believing his pleasure was everlasting and not costly. Steve was the price he paid to have another lie on his bed.

The pain became too much and he collapsed in the center of hallway leading up to their tattered room. His eyes slid shut another time and for a moment the pitch black darkness was a simple comfort. 

Steve had bathed him yet he felt filth remain. His skin itched with the realization of what he had done. He was dirty in a way he felt he could never cleanse himself of. It was his conscience mocking him he initially thought. But no matter hard he rubbed his wrists and let the tears stain his face, the filth would not leave. If his eyes were shut tight it hurt, he rocked back himself back and forth, and cried until breathlessness, no one besides himself and his conscience would know.


	3. So Yesterday

Steve sat on one of the wooden benches in the center of the gallery. It was mostly empty space and white walls. He let his bare feet scrape the surface of the also wooden floor. He had his knees slightly drawn up to allow the movement. 

He was lying at best, not denying. Maybe he hadn't reacted correctly but nor was Tony in the right. 

He let his feet continue sliding on the floor as he tilted his head to the side, resting it on his shoulder. The motion of his legs distracted him for a while longer until he ceased and let himself hunch forward with his head hung low. 

It was true. He hadn't reacted properly. He had perhaps wounded Tony and left him to fend for himself. Steve told himself that he couldn't go back to the mansion. Much less could he face Tony.

He was embarrassed for them both. His emotions had gotten the best of him and it was probable now that the individual that had slept with Tony was tipping off the tabloids as Steve thought. 

His eyes flickered around, observing the works of art he had matted himself. He previously had nothing to his name. Of the few things he had left of his last life, the recollections were both his worst enemy and greatest friend. Back then he could only fathom what curating a gallery would be like. Not that that was common or important at that time. There was a war and he had become a soldier. The only charcoal was the kind he stepped on, remnants of fire. It was soot at best. 

But now, in his current life, he had a gallery that was branded his. It wasn't by his own hand but by Tony's.

***

#### Then:

"I knew the blindfold was a good idea."

"Tony, I can _smell_ Brooklyn. Even if it is a little foreign now. It isn't a blindfold either. I always did like this tie on you."

"Yeah, well, I guess the element of surprise is gone. Go ahead, take it off."

Steve took his time with the tie. Now neatly folded, it was hard not to let his eyes wander as the buildings went by as Tony drove on.

"Why are we in Brooklyn?" The smile obvious in his voice.

"You'll see. You have to promise me you'll close your eyes when I tell you to though."

"Tony."

It was only silent a few moments before he said, "Close your eyes."

For a moment Steve hesitated. He sighed signaling his defeat as he slowly shut his eyes. There was a pause but he could feel Tony's breath hovering dangerously to where his lips were.

Coffee. It was coffee on his breath and he couldn't help but to continue smiling. Steve could simply kiss Tony and have enough caffeine for the day. It was both incredibly endearing and a massive turn on because sometimes it wasn't just coffee. Though Tony's mouth tasted like the beverage, the rest of him smelled really nice to Steve's sensitive sense of smell. The cologne mixed with his natural scent plus his coffee mouth drove Steve wild. 

He didn't have to guess that within the next moment Tony's lips would be on his own. They were chapped slightly but deliciously soft at parts. He let Tony tug his bottom lip. Steve keened and the moment was gone. 

"You brought be all the way to Brooklyn just to kiss me?" he asks with his eyes still shut.

"No."

Tony left his seat of the car and came over to the other side to allow Steve out and take him by the hand. Tony may have squeezed.

"Open them."

Steve was standing in front of an old building. If he was correct, the architecture was not unlike one built in the '20s. The large windows were boarded up and the paint was mostly chipped away. The brick was amazingly, slightly eroded. 

"I brought you to Brooklyn to show you the soon to be gallery you'll be curating."

"Tony."

"I've spoken to the nearest district high school and they're on board with their students having a place to show their work. Students seem pretty cool with it too. I'll be doing most of the fixing. You'll help if you like." Tony shrugs despite standing behind Steve. "I've also spoken with a few people and they seem to be on board with getting a mentoring and internship program started for the students declared art majors. There's a handful of them but I'm sure once they join, more will come tag along. If not then more money for the kids that do." 

Tony took Steve's silence to close the gap between them and wrap his arms around Steve's waist.

"So, what do you think?" Tony spoke into Steve's shoulder blades.

His hands reached Tony's to only be entwined at the fingers. Steve squeezed a bit too hard and Tony had to keep from hollering from the pain.

"I think I love you."

"Do you think or do you know?"

At the blink of an eye, Steve 's grip on Tony's hands were lost and he turned so that he could face him. They locked eyes for a second and then Steve clung to Tony as if he were life itself. He had to slouch to meet Tony's smaller form but held tightly with his arms wrapped around his neck. Steve would've grimaced at the costs of such a present but he allowed himself to be selfish this one time. Except, it was really more of a present for the students of the high school.

"I love you."

"Steve, you smell really nice. Wanna do something that'll change that? Except, you'd probably smell good post-sex too but I'd like to at least test the theory." Tony's hold on Steve's waist tightened. "I love you too."

Steve laughed into Tony's hair.

***

He was standing outside now. The silence of the gallery was simply too loud. He had always liked the sounds of a bustling New York. The cement of the sidewalk wasn't foreign to his bare feet. 

Really, he was disappointed at himself more than anything. He wasn't in his mind and not thinking of the consequences of his actions. His next action would determine a lot. God knew if he'd be able to share a bed with Tony again without remembering the moment he had lost control. 

His neck was beginning to feel sore after having it hang low. He heard the tires screech before he winced as he raised his head to see the car speeding towards him.

***

#### Then:

"You're being ridiculous." 

"Ridiculous? Me? Yeah, says the guy in tight jeans and white shirt to boot. You're asking to be debauched. I will do so with great pleasure."

They were on the floor, with Steve's back against one of the freshly painted white walls. 

"I'll give you that, but tackling a man with power tools is ridiculously dangerous."

Tony was straddling Steve with his knees encasing the sides of Steve's rear. 

"Oh, come on. We're due for a break anyway." Tony slowly ground his hips into Steve, letting him know of his arousal. 

"Kissing is as far as I'll go."

"You're a rotten tease, Rogers. Besides, we're ahead with the renovations and you've got most of the things the kids brought in matted. It's after dark and it's adult time." 

"Somehow, I think this was your plan all along," Steve says letting his hands settle on Tony's hips. Tony arches his back and let's the fabric of his tank rub against the cotton of Steve's shirt.

"Now if you could just lower your hands just a litt--" Steve obliges and his hands are now on the firm muscle of Tony's rear. He squeezes before he starts kneading circles with his fingertips.

"I really didn't picture our first time being in a run down building."

"Well, technically, it's not run down." He gasps as Steve squeezes again. "The windows have been replaced. The walls have been painted. Flooring will be done tomorrow as will the light fixtures. Plumbing will be dealt with the day after. I mean, sex is better than watching the paint dry." 

Tony takes the moment to nab at the wall behind Steve's head and smear paint on Steve's cheek with his coated finger. 

"We're ahead of schedule, really."

"Whatever you say."

Steve kisses Tony and Tony struggles not to grin at the satisfaction of having Steve finally cave. He doesn't have to open his eyes to realize Steve has caught on and pulled back.

"You've got paint in your hair, Steve dearest."

He smiles and he tugs at the hem of Tony's tank, pulling it up and over his head. "And I couldn't care any less, Tony."

Steve's hands have moved up from Tony's rear to his lean abdomen. He runs a finger between the ridges of muscle, teasing at the waistband of the sweats Tony's wearing.

"You're beautiful."

Tony has to duck to not let the heat in his cheeks show. It's something he's picked up from Steve. 

"I get that a lot," the smile evident in the words.

"Do you really?" Steve's hands gave fallen to his sides, rubbing circles with his thumbs.

"Mostly from you." 

"Well," Steve leans in close to leave a wet kiss on Tony's jaw,"it's true." 

Tony leans back in his grasp as Steve continues to leave open mouthed kisses from his chest to the arc reactor to his belly button.

"I want you to know," Tony moans at the tongue darting at his belly button,"the ten seconds it'll take for me to stand and shove my pants off will be the saddest ten seconds I will have lived." 

"Ten, nine, eight," Steve continues his count down as both he and make quick work of there pants. Steve takes a little longer because the jeans really were tight.

"Don't forget to lose the shirt," Tony says as he settles back down to the warmth of Steve's lap. 

"Oh."

It was pornographic. The movement of every muscle in the removal of a simple t-shirt was pornographic. All Tony wanted to do was run his tongue through the carved muscle and nibble at the perfectly pink nipples. The contrast between his own olive skin and Steve's speckled white fueled the urge. 

"How do you feel about cameras?"

"What?"

"Nevermind. Photographic memory will have to do."

Tony wastes no time and places his hands on Steve's shoulders and carefully lifts himself.

"Wait, wait, wait."

"I'm already prepped."

"Excuse me?"

"Yeah. Those power tools did a good job of concealing my little, uh, break. You see, I'm very vocal whe-" 

Steve's laughing into Tony's shoulder. He really is ridiculous. 

"What about-"

"You're immune to disease and I'm clean and I've got the bill of health to prove it. Plus, I'd be depriving myself, really, _so  
em>..."_

_They've locked eyes and Tony's once again lifting himself to only be lowered. He's careful and slow. He wants to make sure he gives Steve a show._

_"Line it up for me, Stevie."_

_"You're ridiculous."_

_"I love you too."_

_He groans as the first contact is felt. Steve's guiding him and Tony's already so close. The simple thought of having the very tip of Steve's member inside him has him at the brink. No amount of prep work could have prepared either of them for the heat._

_"How's it feel, big boy?"_

_Steve's gasping and Tony swears he feels him shudder as he utters the words _big boy _. He also feels his heart beat a mile a minute. A few more seconds and he's fully seated on top of Steve's lap once more. He himself has started breathing heavy into Steve's shoulder.___

___Steve breathes harder and Tony takes his hand and begins smoothly stroking Steve's spine. It doesn't have the desired effect and Steve tries harder not to shiver and come too soon._ _ _

___"Sorry."_ _ _

___"So apologetic even in bed," Tony murmurs. "Just keep breathing. I'm enjoying this as much as you are."_ _ _

___Steve leans back and looks down to Tony's glistening prick. Really, it should have been Steve bottoming if the amount of pre-come Tony's exuding is any indication._ _ _

____We'll have to try later_ , Steve thinks._ _ _

___Steve still has his hands on Tony's ass before he takes one and wraps it around Tony and gives a small tug._ _ _

___"Just keep breathing," Steve whispers, teases into Tony's ear._ _ _

___Tony's laughing and Steve can feel him clench and ease. He's painfully close and he doesn't care if Tony's doing it intentionally._ _ _

___"Don't hold your breathe," he hears him say._ _ _

___There isn't time for Steve to ask what he's referring to because Tony's lifting himself again. He drags the moment and Steve's cock out. Steve's groaning because he knows that anal penetration shouldn't be this easy. He must've given Tony plenty of time. He also groans because Tony's driving him insane and it's taking all he has to not slam him down and be enveloped in his heat again._ _ _

___He's having difficulty sorting through what he loves most. The heat, the genuine affection between them, the lean muscle of Tony's body, the scrapes and scars and callouses. Had he been himself before the serum, he'd definitely be hyperventilating with the excitement._ _ _

___"I said not to hold your breathe," he says as his beard scrapes the shell of Steve's ear._ _ _

___Tony's lifted so that only the very tip of Steve's cock is inside him. He knows Steve's as close as he is. He wants to prolong it._ _ _

___"I dare you," Tony whispers and Steve's hands are on his hips slamming him into his lap._ _ _

___Steve's lifting Tony by his ass and slamming him back down. Another time and this time around, he's very slowly lowering him back onto his dick. It's the calm before the storm because Steve picks up the pace and relieving Tony of any real work. Every thrust and lift is marked by groans and moans leaving their lips. Neither of them know who is in control. Perhaps both or maybe no one at all. They're lost in the pleasure of it all yet they never break the connection their eyes have carelessly made. Their eyes are hooded and they're both scared to blink and miss the moment the other is unmade._ _ _

___The sound of skin on skin echoes in the empty space and it's sinful. It's slick and fast and not as slow as Steve imagined it'd be. But it's Tony and with him it's hardly about limits and restraints. He'll believe, for now, that they'll have enough time to take it slow later._ _ _

___Tony's tightening around him and Steve knows neither can't anymore. As he continues to thrust upwards towards Tony, he takes his hands and places them in either side of Tony's face. The heat between them amplifies the moment Steve brings Tony down and locking their lips. Steve darts his tongue out and Tony's spilling all over the space between them. It eases the friction and it'll be a mess to clean up because Steve's still thrusting._ _ _

___It isn't long before Steve's coming inside of Tony. If possible, Tony feels the heat inside of him increase as Steve pumps his release. It's painfully good and Steve shows no signs of slowing down. At this point, the come is drizzling out of his pucker and the mere thought of not being able to see it trickle down Steve's balls, down his perineum, and possibly into his own hole makes his limping cock give a painful twitch. It's a stretch but what a sight to behold. He'll have to ask Steve how he feels about his own come in and on his own virgin entrance._ _ _

___Steve's finally slowing down and Tony's sure that by now all the come pumped inside of him has trickled down Steve's cock. It must've pooled down below because there's a wetness when he settles back down onto Steve once he's stopped. Steve's still inside of him, still hard._ _ _

___Their chests are heaving and he thinks he'll go mad if Steve's thinking he's ready for round two._ _ _

___They're looking at each other again and Tony realizes he's clenching around Steve. His subconscious is encouraging Steve. Who would've thought?_ _ _

___It's hard to not feel proud about that look Steve's giving him. His eyes are glazed and hazy and clearly searching._ _ _

___Tony's still staring and he feels Steve reach to where they're both joined and teasing the rim of Tony's entrance with his finger. When he withdraws his hand, there's come glazing his finger. The very same finger is in Steve's mouth and Steve's eyes close for a moment as he relishes in the taste. He is still sucking his finger clean when he makes eye contact with Tony again._ _ _

___Tony lifts himself and abandons the warmth of Steve's lap completely. Steve starts and immediately he thinks he's done wrong but Tony's only sliding down his body. Tony wraps his hands around the back of Steve's knees and pulling them up so that they are bent. Tony himself is on his knees, kneeling in front of Steve's still rock hard cock. Steve puts two and two together a little too late because next thing he knows, he's coming again inside of Tony's hot mouth._ _ _

___Tony's careful with his teeth as he draws Steve's second orgasm out. The taste of both the older and fresher come is sweet but more bitter and so filling as he drinks it all down. Some of it trickles to the side of Steve's softening member and Tony doesn't spare it. He's looking up to Steve's face as he drags his tongue along the sides of his softening cock._ _ _

___Tony's on his hunches as he asks,"Satisfying?"_ _ _

___Steve's licking his lips. "Very."_ _ _

___Tony smiles a devilish smile and he turns to lean back on Steve's warm abdomen, still sticky with drying come. He wraps Steve's arms around his own abdomen and falls asleep in the arms of a man he previously hadn't thought he'd fall in love with. As he drifts into sleep, Steve sighs into his hair and he thinks he hears Steve thank him and tell him he loves him._ _ _

___Tony smiles._ _ _

___"I love you too, stud muffin."_ _ _

___Steve laughs into his shoulder._ _ _

___"Not you, the stud strewn on the floor," Tony points to one of the nails laying around._ _ _

___They're both laughing now and it takes a while until they notice the delivery man with their Chinese._ _ _

___***_ _ _

___Tony's standing in front of him now. Both are dressed in sweats and barefoot and look slightly maniacal. The expensive car is parked at an odd angle. The streets are quiet and bare of any people. He's searching the fabric of Steve's hoodie for a way to start things._ _ _

___"The fact of the matter is," Tony starts,"I don't know what I did." He sniffs. "I can't explain it." Tears start streaming down his face. "And I don't know that you'll ever forgive me because..." His lips are quivering again and his hands are clenched into fists. "Because... I'm not sure I'd be able to if our roles were reversed."_ _ _

___"Don't even." Steve's voice is shrill and hoarse. " **No**. You know damn well that that isn't even a possibility. I would never, **never** , do something like this to you. _Never_. And do you know why?"_ _ _

___Tony lifts his head to to try and make eye contact._ _ _

___"I thought that you were worth it. I thought that this," Steve's jabbing his finger where Tony's heart should be,"was worth it. I thought you were worth all the struggle, all the fights, and the disagreements, and worth..." Steve's hand falls from Tony's chest. "Worth fixing," he says almost to himself. "Don't talk to me about reversing the roles because you can't even fathom a fraction about the way I feel or how I felt about you. But that much you got right. I don't know if I _am_ able to forgive you."_ _ _

___"I understand that but I need you to understand that I never meant to hurt you."_ _ _

___"Ha, well what exactly did you think this would cause." Steve laughs without mirth. It's an empty sound. "Did you think I'd be glad? Is that it? Was that your intention?"_ _ _

___Steve's in Tony's face and his fists are in Tony's shirt. His feet are nearly dangling off the ground._ _ _

___"Damn you for what you did. **Damn you**."_ _ _

___Steve's crying when he shoves Tony down and starts for his bike._ _ _

___"No, you don't get to do this. Not again." Tony doesn't know where the strength to say what he said and grab Steve by the elbow and turn him around came._ _ _

___All he knows is that Steve's wounded and talking won't be enough._ _ _


End file.
